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 lard pirates dawt cawm  §  CHUT TRADING TAGS: SERIES 1 / by Spoony Spoonicus
 
 
 the waggoner  §  articles and general riff-raff exceeding your expectations of worthlessness.
 
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 ~Spoony Spoonicus on 06:13pm 12/02/08 (03:04pm 12/02/08) in 33m39s  §  2472 eyeballs
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Collect them all!

- SHITTLE
The Lardpirates' demented little bastard child, dispensing cryptic phrases, quotes and utter nonsense since 2004. His database continues to grow on a daily basis as the frequenters of the #lardpirates IRC channel add to his growing insanity.


- ERROR
A fat elf-man from the second game in the acclaimed Zelda series, Zelda II: The Adventure of Link, he is Error. In keeping with his namesake, he also points out errors that arise on the site at any opportunity. One of the very few chuts to make use of the Fixedsys font.


- Miles Edgeworth
Cynical, easily irritated, and he loves the sauce a little too much. But then, you'd probably be pretty bitter too if your father were murdered and the guy who did it got off scot-free. Hell, it might even drive you to become a prosecutor and get an undefeated streak of convictions as a bizarre form of revenge. As a result, we stuck him on heckling duty for any horrible bits of fiction we run across in our travels.


- clobberpuppy
In addition to being a crime-fighter with a slew of weird gadgets, he's an aficionado of cheesy old movies, video games, TV shows and pop culture in general. Mostly seen in our Heckles section, but coming to a freeware PC game near you sometime soon in the next three or four years.


- Avatar
The champion of the eight virtues of Britannia and a shining example to its populace. But what most people don't realize is that he's a dopey shmuck with little regard for the law of the land, Virtuous or otherwise. In fact, he just seems to be in it for the glory, and to see just how much he can get away with while riding the fame of his previous exploits.


- The Guardian
Seemingly omnipotent and invincible conqueror of worlds who seeks to add Britannia to his expansive collection. Also serves as a constant nemesis to the Avatar, whom he frequently belittles throughout his questionable endeavors.


- 86
A mute girl whose only means of communication is through crudely-drawn pictures. In spite of this, she has significant prestige within the forces of the SF Kosmo Gang, running operations within their expansive space fruit smuggling ring.


- Alan Smithee
A name formerly used by directors who wished to be distanced from their work, the same principle applies here - if someone's works or comments get seperated from them for any reason, they end up under Alan's moniker.


- Angry Video Game Nerd
A walking encyclopedia of awful video games, having played little else over the span of two decades. He now recounts his tales of endless anger and frustration with liberal use of profanity and copious amounts of Rolling Rock beer.


- Megido
An anti-hero character within the video game Silhouette Mirage, ironically predating Shyna's enlistment to the Lardpirates crew by a good two years. Makes his opinions known with a gentlemanly air and a bottomless supply of razor-tipped roses.


- Mr. Elk
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a cherry
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