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"Heeeehahaha! Heeheheheheeeee!" Taint giggled, rummaging around in the Eagle Humper as Myen laid back on the forest floor, waiting for the swelling to go down in his nads. "MYEN! Check this shit out!" He yelled, as he kicked out the door of the plane that led directly to the cargo area. With one hand he lifted an abnormally large-barreled gun into the air, squeezed the trigger, and blew himself back into the plane as a streak of burning powder shot into the air. A few seconds later and a powerful charge of dynamite split the sky with an enormous boom, echoing across the forest valley. Over the ringing in his ears, Myen could just barely make out the joyous laughter of Taint.

"What the HELL?" Myen yelled as he stood up.

"I f--nd m- --d- ---myte g--!" Taint said, jumping a few feet forward and landing in front of of Myen, both their faces a few inches apart.

"What?" Myen asked.

"I fou-- my da-- dyna--te gu-!" Taint repeated.

"You found your dad's dynamite gun?" Myen repeated to the best of his abilities.

"HELL. FUCKING. YES." Taint screamed as he slid another stick down the barrel, pointed it straight up and pulled the trigger. The blast knocked him on his ass as another stick rose into the air. With a sound of glass breaking, a very large misshapen ball of jagged ice formed in mid air. "FUCK WRONG STICK" Taint yelled and scrambled underneath the plane's wing. Myen wisely followed as sharp spears of ice rained down on the area. One shard cleanly decapitated the boar's corpse. Taint found this terribly amusing and began laughing even more than he was after the first stick he shot into the air.

"That is a nice find." Myen said, climbing out from under the wing to find that seven large ice shards had imbedded themselves into the wing above where they were hiding.

"Thats not even the BEST part! Look what else I've got!" Taint said as he pulled another stick of dynamite out of his coat. It was red, with yellow wax capping off each end of the stick. No fuse was visible. "Do you know how much I've wanted another stick of this?" Taint asked.

"No, what the heck is it?"

"Here, read up on it." Taint pulled out his dynamite guide, flipped to the last page, and handed it to Myen.

Buster Dynamite
Bright red wrapper with yellow caps, marked with "BUSTER".
DETONATION OF THIS DYNAMITE IN ANY LOCATION IS PUNISHABLE BY A MINIMUM OF 10 YEARS IN PRISON.
IF YOU FIND THIS DYNAMITE, PLEASE INFORM THE LOCAL AUTHORITIES. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO TRANSPORT YOURSELF.
DO NOT ALLOW TAINT BIGSBY TO KNOW YOU HAVE FOUND THIS DYNAMITE. GIVING TAINT THIS DYNAMITE IS THE SAME AS DETONATING IT.
First Detonation: Taint Bigsby.

The color drained from Myen's face. Taint noticed his reaction and laughed.

"W... what does that thing even do?" Myen barely managed to squeak out. He knew it was a bad idea to give Taint dynamite, but he'd never heard of a LAW against giving him a certain type.

"Remember when the Gavier Bros had announced they were making a new type of dynamite, and then their entire factory just up and vanished?"

"Uh... yeah."

"A stick of this shit went off. Right in my hand."

"What?!"

"I shit you not, this thing teleported our asses into SPACE for about five minutes. We had a little chat with a bird dude, and he gave us a ride back down to dirt and dropped us next to this big steaming hole where the factory used to be."

"What happened to the guys in the factory?"

"Fuck if I know. Charlie probably knows."

"Okay then, why the harsh punishment for lighting this off?"

"IMAGINE IF I LAUNCHED THE ENTIRE POPULATION OF THE LESSER CRATERS INTO SPACE AND HOW FUN THAT WOULD BE. The Arms don't like people having fun!"

"What happens in space anyway?"

"You just kind of float around, kinda looks all dark blue and purply, and there was that bird dude up there. Called him Tweets, although I don't think he got the joke."

"You should probably give that to me, Taint, so we don't wind up in space. Or dead. I think you're making this stuff up and really it just killed a whole lot of people."

"NO, dude, its cool." Taint said as he backed away from Myen and stuffed the dynamite back in his jacket. "If I killed some chags why am I not in jail now? It's like I said, the Arms don't want me having fun because I usually wind up breaking their shit."

"Give it to me."

"Fuck you, I'm saving this for when we NEED it. You've got my WORD." he said, reaching into his jacket again and pulling out a little white card. WORD was written on it in black letters. He handed it to Myen.

"Word?" Myen asked, looking at the card.

"Don't hurt yourself thinking about it, lets just get back up this hill." Taint slid another stick of dynamite into his dad's gun and fired it over his shoulder, shoving him face down in the dirt and taking down several trees behind him, which landed on the Eagle Humper.

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- Alpha Communicator <- 7:50:29 pm, saturday, october 28th, 2006 pdt